Lessons Learned at Walnut Ridge

Day we moved in, March 15 2014.

Today marks the last day we will be calling Apartment 406 our home. Soon after this post I will begin the long and tedious job of packing the remainder of our belongings into boxes so they can be ready tomorrow morning when friends and family will help us move into what will be our new home for the next 15 months.
I have mixed feelings about this place. As soon as we are settled into our new apartment I am ready to type out a most unflattering 1-star review on every apartment website I can find about this place: Our water heater breaking our first day here, our cars broken into 3 times in 6 months, the upstairs toilet leaking all over me and not getting fixed for 3 days, the incorrect dishwasher installation which flooded our kitchen and living room and took 2 weeks to fix, the neighbors who played awful music so loud our bedroom mirror rattled all night, the police getting called 3 times in one night and the apartment night duty still refusing to do anything about it, the stray cat who took refuge in our back porch and never left, the dryer vent being so full of years worth of lint it caused our dryer to overheat and break twice, and the limitless supply of roaches crawling all over the place no matter how much Raid I sprayed will definitely be mentioned in my review.

All in all, I'm glad to be moving out of this complex and into a nicer one, but I still have enough insight to appreciate the valuable lessons we learned over the past year and a half, and just how much Philip and I have grown as individuals and as a family.
Back in March of 2014 this apartment was definitely not our first choice, but it was all we could afford at the time. I remember it took every penny from both of our full-time incomes just to be able to pay for our rent, give the minimum payment on all of our credit cards, fill our gas tanks to halfway once a week, put $40 into savings, and have just enough left over to buy a  bag of dog food and groceries to make sandwiches. I took to extreme couponing, selling old textbooks on Amazon, and taking online surveys for a little extra cash. Phil used his days off to do some work on the side building house decks. Back then, our idea of a fancy date was spending $5 on a couple of Sam's Club hot dogs and sodas, and then taking half an hour to browse around the store carrying a bag of rawhide bones for our dog, for which we had carefully set aside $17. I suppose our priorities were slightly askew... but Venom was like our first son, so you can't blame us too much.

We have come a long way in just 1.5 years. The last of our many credit cards is well on its way to being paid off, we don't have bill collectors calling 10 times a day, we finally have ridiculously expensive health insurance (thanks a lot, Obama), we could afford to take a nice vacation two months ago, we have enough in our emergency fund that buying $1,000 new truck tires was not a big inconvenience, we spoil ourselves by eating out with friends on a weekly basis, we are preparing to move into a more expensive apartment and rely only on Phil's income, and most importantly, we are getting ready to welcome a very special baby into our family... plus all the bills that come along with him, such as mom going into nesting overload and tirelessly shopping for nursery furniture and decor. We have also outgrown most of the hand-me-downs that started us off as a newlywed couple: goodbye saggy old couches, scratched and wobbly side tables, mismatched bedroom furniture, ancient lamps that seemed to breed spider webs, plastic and warped dollar-store plates and cups, Craigslist dining table and chairs, and secondhand washer and dryer units.

I can fully attest our financial progress was due to the blessings of paying a full and honest tithe. Sometimes it was hard to let go of so much money, especially since just one week of tithing could have granted us a month of groceries, or could have paid for me to take a weekend trip and visit my parents in Los Fresnos, or could have purchased a much-needed pair of steel-toed work boots for Philip... but if there was ever ONE thing my husband and I agreed on in our ever-feisty relationship, it was that tithing came first and everything else would fall into place later. And we saw the Lord's promise being fulfilled time and time again, almost on a weekly basis. I sometimes think that it was purely the Lord's hand which kept us from robbing a bank. God helped us in very creative ways: a random $100 HEB gift card from my boss, an extra 4 hours of overtime for Philip, a late birthday card in the mail containing a $50 bill, an unexpected credit line increase just in time to pay for a medical expense, someone offering $20 to use our truck to move furniture, a friend offering to pay for a meal at a restaurant, and our absolute favorite: those months of the year which have 5 Fridays instead of 4, which gave us a whole extra paycheck to catch our breath, splurge on the good deli meat, and get wild enough to go to the movies and buy popcorn AND hot dogs AND a soda.

Early in our marriage, the life of an oilfield wife seemed very daunting. (Philip is an oilfield pipe fitter, in case you don't know). Philip works as a contractor, taking jobs as they come, and unexpectedly getting laid off as the jobs finish, or the project goes over budget, or if he makes a bad enough mistake (which has only happened once), or even something as trivial as an angry foreman having a bad day and firing the first person in his line of sight (which has also happened, unfortunately). It is not uncommon for him to start a new job with a new company 4 or 5 times a year... which makes gathering our W-2 forms during tax season quite the project, and also gives us about 2 to 4 weeks of extreme "in-between-jobs" panic each time it happens. And then, once he does manage to get started, it's the erratic schedule of the jobs themselves. Some are out of town, some are out of state, some are offshore, and some (like now) are overnight, which gives us a very limited amount of time to spend together.

It is because of the experiences with these jobs that I consider us a stronger, more stable family. I have learned how to be less attached, more independent, and to place my complete trust in his ability to provide for us. He, on the other hand, has been brave enough to take all kinds of jobs, work with all kinds of people, in all kinds of places, and trust that I am holding my own back at home, budgeting and getting our bills paid, and not burning down the house by forgetting to clean the lint out of the drier.

So all in all, I think we are ready. He has gained enough work experience to accept only the high-paying jobs and provide for us, I have gained the confidence to live on my own when necessary (I can change a flat tire while pregnant, guys. The extra weight actually makes it easier.), and we have both learned to trust the Lord and trust each other to make wise, independent decisions.

Although moving to an apartment complex 1 mile away may not seem such a big deal, I feel a strong sense of accomplishment because this move marks the end of a growth period and the beginning of another, especially since we are on the verge of becoming first-time parents. Goodbye Walnut Ridge, and see you tomorrow Camden Copper Ridge!

Living with In-Laws

Due to some rather unfortunate circumstances which were out of our control, Philip and I were left without an apartment for a month and a half. Thanks to the wonderfully giving nature of his parents, we were able to live at their house during this time (about 7 weeks). It was a lot tougher for me than it was for him, and although I am eternally grateful to his parents for letting us stay there, I can't say I was always 100% comfortable not having my own house. Nevertheless, I did learn some insightful things from this experience:

1. Doing laundry is much much simpler when you only have 1/5 of all your clothes available to wear. 
2. No flat-ironing, curling, or chemicals for a 7 weeks does wonders for my hair. 
3. Having more than one dog in a house is nuts. Although I'd love to one day get Venom a lady Labrador, it's definitely never going to happen until we have a house with a large enough back yard for them to terrorize. 
4. You can never have enough dog kibble and bathroom tissue... Venom consumes copious amounts of both, to our wallet's extreme annoyance. 
5. Since Phil and I now longer have the freedom to hang out in separate bedrooms, we either get along or life sucks. Having just one room to be together has done wonders to our problem-solving and discussions. 
6. I learned how to share a bathroom. Sort of. Although I never stopped getting confused with all the shampoo and conditioner bottles, it really wasn't that bad. I suppose normal people from large families think nothing of bathroom sharing, but I've always had my own, so it was new to me. 
7. Even if I had my entire array of church clothes, I'd probably still stick to the same 2 skirts. I didn't even notice the heavy depletion of my wardrobe on Sundays. 
8. Having 2 pairs of shoes will not kill me. By the end of our stay I didn't even remember what the other 28 pairs looked like. 
9. Being 24 years old, holding a Bachelor of Science, and a full-time almost professional job does NOT make me any less scared of dark hallways and open closets at night. 
10. TELEVISION SUCKS! I have always seen TV as something you do only when there's nothing else to do, but in mom and dad Wyeth's household, a TV is on at any time when people are awake. I can see why it's so entertaining to some people, but not to me. And it was a challenge finding a quiet place to read a book. I think the lack of quiet accounted for about 60% of the challenge of living in a house besides my own. 

I'd like to again mention how utterly grateful I am to his parents for giving us a place to live during our time of need. My largest struggle was to swallow my pride and allow someone to help us out, but all that means is that I have issues with humility, which I am trying to improve. I'm looking forward to our new apartment and will keep my fingers crossed that we only have to move ONE more time (into a house) for the next several years. Good luck to us! 

Intro to Couponing

The following are lessons I've learned through trial and error in my quest to become a so called "extreme couponer". I'm sharing these mostly for the benefit of a handful of girlfriends who asked about it and want to give it a try, but if anyone out there has any questions, feel free to ask :) 

1. Get a Sunday newspaper subscription OR go out and buy a newspaper every Sunday. Sometimes subscriptions are more expensive because you have to pay extra for deliveries or be forced to "tip" carriers. If this is the case, just pick your closest favorite gas station and purchase it there. Typical price is $2 per copy, but sometimes there are well over $100 in coupon inserts, plus who doesn't love Garfield comics? Personal lesson learned: once you've gotten into the couponing habit, do not miss purchasing these papers, not even for one Sunday. You'll regret it later. 
2. Get organized. Go purchase a 3-ring binder, one or two packs of 9-pocket plastic sheets (the kind used to hold baseball cards), page protectors, and divider tabs. As soon as I got my first newspaper, I clipped every single coupon available (even for cat food and baby wipes, and I have no need for either) and then stuck them all in a letter envelope. Almost 100% of these were thrown away because I forgot all about them. Personal lesson learned: find a system that works for you, and then stick to it. 
3. Pick and choose which coupons are for you. My biggest mistake was to clip every single coupon in the paper, bring them to the grocery store, and use as many as I could on every item possible. WRONG thing to do. If you don't need Old Spice deodorant, spicy hummus, or 4 bottles of air freshener, then don't even clip the coupons. Look through them all and clip your "basics" for things you purchase regularly, like milk, soap, toothpaste, dog food, laundry detergent, etc. Then do a second run and clip coupons for things you might consider buying if the price is right; candy, makeup, and junk food are in my category. Toss the rest away. Personal lesson learned: attempting to use all your coupons wastes A LOT of money. 
4. Find websites for printable coupons. Not all of your coupons will come from Sunday newspaper inserts, they will also come from your very own computer! My shortcut is to follow thekrazycouponlady because they keep up a running database of over 2,000 printable coupons plus list the current newspaper coupons as well. You'll have to install a 'coupon printer' on your computer, and make sure you have your default printer set and working because you only get two printouts per coupon per printer. Personal lesson learned: if you use several printers installed on one computer, make sure you are printing out of the correct one and that you have ink and paper in there, because you only get two chances to click Print, and then it's gone. Note: it is illegal to photocopy coupons, but if you have more than one computer, you can print multiples (hint, you can go to a public library and print two per each computer you use). 
5. Pick a store. Or two. Perfect your couponing strategies a little at a time. My top two couponing stores are Target and CVS, which offer different items on sale each week and allow you to "stack" a store coupon with a manufacturer coupon for extra savings. Go to their respective websites, find their coupon policies, and read over them carefully. If possible, print out a copy and stick it in your coupon binder because a lot of the time cashiers have no idea what they're talking about when the try to deny you the use of a coupon. Personal lesson learned: don't let a huffy, annoyed cashier get the best of you. Be nice, polite, but stand your ground if you know you're right. And don't be afraid to talk to managers. 
6. Judge a book by it's cover. This goes along with understanding each store's coupon policy. When you're ready to pay for your items, do not be afraid to profile the cashiers. Always try to go for the young, male cashier who looks ready for quitting time, not for the lady who takes her job too seriously. They will care less about the coupons you're using and not try to fight you on anything. (that's my experience anyway). Be polite, smile, and state upfront that you will be using coupons with your purchase. It doesn't hurt to ask if they'd like the coupons in a specific order. Personal lesson learned: don't attempt a large shopping trip at 5pm on a Friday when the store is packed and everyone gets annoyed with difficult transactions. 

Lesson Learned

I am incredibly susceptible to any kind of drug. (not that I've tried many) My most excruciating migraine can be gone with 500mg of acetaminophen, or sometimes just a few sips of coke or mountain dew. I cannot be around people when I take a NyQuil because I will act like I was out drinking all night, and it's incredibly annoying. Aright, so you get the point, right? Me + Drugs = NormalEffect^3 

Monday night I tossed and turned in bed for hours... I think I got 3 hours of sleep total, and not the good, deep sleep... the one where you still know what's going on around you, just with your eyes closed. I hate insomnia. So Tuesday night Phil suggested that I take a Tylenol PM so I could get some rest, and I concurred since I hate sleepless nights. This was my first time taking Tylenol for something other than very bad pain, and it was NOT A GOOD IDEA. 

30 minutes after I swallowed that little pill I succumbed into a nearly comatose sleep that lasted 10 hours. It was great and all, but when the time came to go to work it was like raising the dead. Like a mummy in those kinds of movies. I went the entire day wishing I could go back to bed, and by lunchtime I had developed an actual migraine that usually only comes when I haven't had enough sleep. I decided more painkillers was NOT what I needed, so I just toughed it out for the rest of the day. I went to bed with a migraine, plus I think my body was still not over the hibernating thing because I slept a full 10 hours again, but woke up with the same headache. 

So I have no idea what the heck is going on in this head of mine, but I know 3 things: I'm still sleepy, my head still hurts, and I will stay far away from any sort of sleeping aids from now on. If my torpid state lasts until lunchtime then I will resort to some of my precious Mountain Dew. *falls asleep on the keyboard* *logkeffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff*