Friday, August 28, 2015

Lessons Learned at Walnut Ridge

Day we moved in, March 15 2014.
Today marks the last day we will be calling Apartment 406 our home. Soon after this post I will begin the long and tedious job of packing the remainder of our belongings into boxes so they can be ready tomorrow morning when friends and family will help us move into what will be our new home for the next 15 months.
I have mixed feelings about this place. As soon as we are settled into our new apartment I am ready to type out a most unflattering 1-star review on every apartment website I can find about this place: Our water heater breaking our first day here, our cars broken into 3 times in 6 months, the upstairs toilet leaking all over me and not getting fixed for 3 days, the incorrect dishwasher installation which flooded our kitchen and living room and took 2 weeks to fix, the neighbors who played awful music so loud our bedroom mirror rattled all night, the police getting called 3 times in one night and the apartment night duty still refusing to do anything about it, the stray cat who took refuge in our back porch and never left, the dryer vent being so full of years worth of lint it caused our dryer to overheat and break twice, and the limitless supply of roaches crawling all over the place no matter how much Raid I sprayed will definitely be mentioned in my review.

All in all, I'm glad to be moving out of this complex and into a nicer one, but I still have enough insight to appreciate the valuable lessons we learned over the past year and a half, and just how much Philip and I have grown as individuals and as a family.
Back in March of 2014 this apartment was definitely not our first choice, but it was all we could afford at the time. I remember it took every penny from both of our full-time incomes just to be able to pay for our rent, give the minimum payment on all of our credit cards, fill our gas tanks to halfway once a week, put $40 into savings, and have just enough left over to buy a  bag of dog food and groceries to make sandwiches. I took to extreme couponing, selling old textbooks on Amazon, and taking online surveys for a little extra cash. Phil used his days off to do some work on the side building house decks. Back then, our idea of a fancy date was spending $5 on a couple of Sam's Club hot dogs and sodas, and then taking half an hour to browse around the store carrying a bag of rawhide bones for our dog, for which we had carefully set aside $17. I suppose our priorities were slightly askew... but Venom was like our first son, so you can't blame us too much.

We have come a long way in just 1.5 years. The last of our many credit cards is well on its way to being paid off, we don't have bill collectors calling 10 times a day, we finally have ridiculously expensive health insurance (thanks a lot, Obama), we could afford to take a nice vacation two months ago, we have enough in our emergency fund that buying $1,000 new truck tires was not a big inconvenience, we spoil ourselves by eating out with friends on a weekly basis, we are preparing to move into a more expensive apartment and rely only on Phil's income, and most importantly, we are getting ready to welcome a very special baby into our family... plus all the bills that come along with him, such as mom going into nesting overload and tirelessly shopping for nursery furniture and decor. We have also outgrown most of the hand-me-downs that started us off as a newlywed couple: goodbye saggy old couches, scratched and wobbly side tables, mismatched bedroom furniture, ancient lamps that seemed to breed spider webs, plastic and warped dollar-store plates and cups, Craigslist dining table and chairs, and secondhand washer and dryer units.

I can fully attest our financial progress was due to the blessings of paying a full and honest tithe. Sometimes it was hard to let go of so much money, especially since just one week of tithing could have granted us a month of groceries, or could have paid for me to take a weekend trip and visit my parents in Los Fresnos, or could have purchased a much-needed pair of steel-toed work boots for Philip... but if there was ever ONE thing my husband and I agreed on in our ever-feisty relationship, it was that tithing came first and everything else would fall into place later. And we saw the Lord's promise being fulfilled time and time again, almost on a weekly basis. I sometimes think that it was purely the Lord's hand which kept us from robbing a bank. God helped us in very creative ways: a random $100 HEB gift card from my boss, an extra 4 hours of overtime for Philip, a late birthday card in the mail containing a $50 bill, an unexpected credit line increase just in time to pay for a medical expense, someone offering $20 to use our truck to move furniture, a friend offering to pay for a meal at a restaurant, and our absolute favorite: those months of the year which have 5 Fridays instead of 4, which gave us a whole extra paycheck to catch our breath, splurge on the good deli meat, and get wild enough to go to the movies and buy popcorn AND hot dogs AND a soda.

Early in our marriage, the life of an oilfield wife seemed very daunting. (Philip is an oilfield pipe fitter, in case you don't know). Philip works as a contractor, taking jobs as they come, and unexpectedly getting laid off as the jobs finish, or the project goes over budget, or if he makes a bad enough mistake (which has only happened once), or even something as trivial as an angry foreman having a bad day and firing the first person in his line of sight (which has also happened, unfortunately). It is not uncommon for him to start a new job with a new company 4 or 5 times a year... which makes gathering our W-2 forms during tax season quite the project, and also gives us about 2 to 4 weeks of extreme "in-between-jobs" panic each time it happens. And then, once he does manage to get started, it's the erratic schedule of the jobs themselves. Some are out of town, some are out of state, some are offshore, and some (like now) are overnight, which gives us a very limited amount of time to spend together.

It is because of the experiences with these jobs that I consider us a stronger, more stable family. I have learned how to be less attached, more independent, and to place my complete trust in his ability to provide for us. He, on the other hand, has been brave enough to take all kinds of jobs, work with all kinds of people, in all kinds of places, and trust that I am holding my own back at home, budgeting and getting our bills paid, and not burning down the house by forgetting to clean the lint out of the drier.

So all in all, I think we are ready. He has gained enough work experience to accept only the high-paying jobs and provide for us, I have gained the confidence to live on my own when necessary (I can change a flat tire while pregnant, guys. The extra weight actually makes it easier.), and we have both learned to trust the Lord and trust each other to make wise, independent decisions.

Although moving to an apartment complex 1 mile away may not seem such a big deal, I feel a strong sense of accomplishment because this move marks the end of a growth period and the beginning of another, especially since we are on the verge of becoming first-time parents. Goodbye Walnut Ridge, and see you tomorrow Camden Copper Ridge!

Saturday, August 1, 2015

At Least It's Crossed Off My Bucket List

This post is over a month late, but I need to record it anyway. In June of 2015 I had the great opportunity to cross off a bucket list item: Go Whitewater Rafting. If we use our brains though, we see that Damaris also happened to be pregnant during June 2015, which was NOT an ideal situation. Thankfully, nothing terrible happened,but the experience is definitely filed away under the "never again" category.

So here's the deal with why it was not a good idea to go rafting while 17 weeks pregnant: 
1) I went from Corpus Christi, TX to Vernal, UT... an altitude change of 5,320 feet. I was fighting to catch my breath while just walking through the airport, plus pregnancy already causes shortness of breath. It was terrible.
2) Utah was HOT. I'm used to hot and humid weather, but I'm always INSIDE a nicely air-conditioned building. It turns out the great outdoors is not air conditioned. It was 105 degrees out there.
3) Because we were traveling, I had little choice but to eat mostly unhealthy foods, which affected my already-delicate blood pressure situation.
4) I was in the awkward stage of pregnancy where I just looked super puffy and overweight, not exactly belly-bumping it yet. I felt like I got a lot of "you're too fat to be doing this" looks, which was probably just my imagination, but I still felt self-conscious.
5) I was too big for the life vest to fit correctly over my stomach, so even though our guide tugged hard on the straps to make it super tight (ouch), it still rode up over my shoulders and hit my chin and allowed for very limited movement overall.
6) I'm positive I didn't take a full "fill-up-your-lungs" breath the entire day. Nobody noticed, but I was constantly on the verge of a panic attack from not being able to breathe correctly.

But here's the deal with why I went whitewater rafting anyway:
1) It was on my bucket list, and I felt that once the baby was born bucket list opportunities would be almost nonexistent.
2) I had never really vacationed in Utah, or in any place with mountains for that matter, and I was interested in the geology.
3) I felt I owed it to my super adventurous husband, who spends the majority of his life working and was extremely excited about this trip.
4) I was stubborn and wanted to prove to myself that I could do anything I wanted, pregnant or not.

And here are some pictures of our adventure:
See the difference between how Phil's vest fit and how mine fit? He didn't mind his at all.
The mountains and rock formations were BEAUTIFUL. I love geology.
Fun fact, I also went to the ER the next day. Apparently I hurt my rotator cuff while paddling. 
This trip felt like a near-death experience to me, but it was a walk in the park for my husband.
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